Travelin Monkey

Yesterday we headed out to the beach to go swim. The water was beautiful; not as clear as I would hope for, but nice and warm. We swam for a while. Yesterday I found a Sea Urchin while walking on the beach (almost stepped on it too), today I thought I had stepped on a rock, but nope, it was a starfish!

We walked for a while, talked nonesense, looking for more topless women, when we decided to stop and enjoy the day. At around 2:30, we decided to head back to a water park we found because at 3 pm there was going to be a famous Brasilian, Edson Gomez, playing. After hanging out there for a while, we decided to come back, nap, wake up, eat, and head out to the center to check out the night life.

30 minutes into this plan, everything failed. Matt didn’t nap and I was eaten alive by the mosquitos. We ended up talking to the family that works there, asking them some questions and just conversing. We aslo played with one of the youngest daughters on the hammock. Turns out that the owner is a fat (very fat) French guy who is married to this woman. He used to play rugby in France and went to Brasil for a vacation, met her, Tuna, got married, and moved back to France. He hated it so much, he came back and put up this pousada, but gained like 80 kg in 6 months!!

The guy that we met on the ferry that got us this place, Beatu, turns out to be a really awesome kid. After hanging out there for a while, Beatu came over and we started to talk about the exchange rates. We ended up going to look around, but to no avail. When we got back, the family had started their nightly BBQ with heavy drinking (25 liters of beer a night), and our French neighbors, Florence & Camaron (that is what we called him), had brought 2 bottles of cana to make caipirinhias.

We joined them, talking, laughing, eating picania, and drinking caipirinhias. At around midnight, we headed out on the ferry? to cross to go to Porto Seguro and dance at a club called Alcatraz. The taxi ride was amazingly funny, making me feel like I was in Uruguay back in the good old days of Piriapolis, when we used to go out to the Country Pub.

We get to the club and Beatu hooks us up with cheap tickets to get in and drinks. He spent the ferry ring making up songs about all of us and they think Camaron is gay. He got us a drink called Capeta; milk, chocolate, coconut, vodka, and guarana powder. I thought it was good and kept us up ALL NIGHT LONG. We walk in and the place is packed and awesome. There were 4 areas, one where dancers teach you Samba, one is a bar/food area, another was a trance dance floor, and the last a kareoke bar.

There were people EVERYWHERE, it could have been a really awesome night, if it weren’t for one fact that they were ALL kids aged 12-16 old. The funny thing was being pushed around by the youngens who thought we were picking up on them! Some were very noticably young, they looked like they hadn’t even hit puberty yet! The guys still had the peach fuzz leg hairs and you could tell most had just started puberty. It was interesting looking at all the drunken hookups going around and the idiots trying to pick up. It was also interesting watching the women, all dressed like they were untouchable Britney Spears, but 10 years younger.

It was an experience I hope never to repeat. It made us feel like dirty perverts. The French guy tried to pick up on all the girls. We got on a bus to go back home with all the youngens and he harrassed every single one of em, boys and girls alike! The women looked at us like dogs, but were somewhat curious. The boys looked at us in envy of our attitudes and mannerisms. We get off the bus and started walking, thinking that we were going to go home. But, we ended up going to a kareoke bar where the locals women (25+) were dancing, singing, and drinking. Between then and when we actually got home, they must have drunk at least 10 liters of beer!

The women were fat, ugly whores. Everyone was having a random hookup, drinking and then having another hookup with someone else! People who were married, had rings, and even talked about their significant other where still hooking up with all the tourists. No matter WHAT happened, they couldn’t stop drinking. This one woman, fat and ugly, with frizzy hair came to talk to us because Beatu asked her to. I was communicating with hand gestures and mixed Spanish.

At some point, this ugly HUGE whore came in a white dress with a huge pot belly sticking out and an even bigger ass. She tried to seduce us and kept on asking for money, for us to buy her drinks, etc etc. That became the theme of the night. I don’t think there was a single person that didn’t ask us for something. I was very tired, very fed up with them, and mad that I had blown R$20 on a night club for youngens. These whores kept on kissing our cheeks, slow dancing with us, and rubbing up against us. We went with the flow because in a place where you don’t know jack, with people you’ve met for the first time that might have guns, you can only be freindly and hope for the best Especially if you don’t know how to get back home.

So, this continued on with Camaron jumping and climbing all over the place. He hooked up with on firl and ended up bringing her home for some dirty lovin. Beatu ended up with Flo. At one point in the night, it started to pour like crazy and I thought “great, finally the party ended.” Little did I know I was in the BAHIA LLENO DE ALEGRIA!! They just moved the kareoke machine indoors, continued the debauchery in a smaller area until around 6 am when that bar closed. So what did we do? Did we go home? NOPE!! Crossed the street, bought another liter of beer, and kept on drinking!

Camaron ended up getting us a cab, we fit 7 people in it! We got to the port and had to wait about 45 minutes for the ferry to leave. Camaron and some other guy started doing Capoiera while we clapped and sang the song. It was the funniest thing ever. We laughed so much! At one point Camaron tried to do a move, ended up doing hte splits and getting his ass all wet with the grease!!

I feel that if I had known the language better, I woudl feel more comfortable doing crazy stupid fun things, but the lack of communication hinders. We came home, showered twice, and slept for 6 hours.

We woke up today for breakfast, went to the centro, ate lunch, and slept until now.? Matt is still asleep, everyone is going the nightly eating, drinking, and talking with the owners!!

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